First things first: You don’t need to have all the answers. You’re not a therapist, and honestly, your partner isn’t expecting you to be. They just need you to be there, with a little patience, a lot of kindness, and maybe a snack or two (because, let’s be real, snacks help everything).
Being there without trying to fix everything
If your partner is struggling, your instinct might be to jump in with solutions. Makes sense—you don’t want to see them hurting. But mental health isn’t something you can fix with a pep talk or a to-do list. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is just listen.
Picture this: Your partner says, “I’ve been feeling really down.” Now, one response might be, “Well, have you tried exercising? Or thinking more positive thoughts?” But that’s probably not what they need. A better response? “That sounds really rough. Do you want to talk about it, or do you just need me to sit with you?”
See the difference? The first one feels like a homework assignment. The second one feels like support.
Little things make a big difference
You don’t need some grand plan to be supportive. Small, everyday things can mean the world. Picking up their favorite coffee, handling a chore they’re too drained to do, or just sending a text to remind them you’re thinking of them—it all adds up.
Also, humor helps. Obviously, don’t joke about their struggles, but sometimes a funny meme, a ridiculous TikTok, or a well-timed “Hey, wanna watch a show and ignore life for a bit?” can lighten the mood.
Encouragement without pressure
It’s great to encourage your partner to take care of themselves, but there’s a fine line between support and pressure. If they’re feeling low, saying “You should really go outside, it’ll fix everything!” might just make them feel worse. Instead, try something like, “Want to take a short walk together? No pressure, but I think some fresh air might help a little.”
That way, you’re offering a gentle nudge without making them feel guilty if they’re not up for it. Some days, getting out of bed is a win, and that’s okay.
Don’t forget about yourself
This one’s important: You can’t help someone else if you’re completely drained. Supporting a partner with mental health struggles can be hard, and you’re allowed to take care of yourself too. Set boundaries when you need to, reach out to your own support system, and make sure you’re doing things that bring you joy (yes, even if that means binge-watching reality TV while eating an unreasonable amount of chocolate).
Therapy is a good thing
If your partner is really struggling, professional help can make a huge difference. Encouraging them to see a therapist or doctor isn’t a sign of giving up—it’s the opposite. And if they’re nervous about it, you can help by offering to look up options with them or just being supportive of the process.
Mental health struggles don’t mean someone is broken, and getting help doesn’t mean they’re weak. It just means they’re human.
Love isn’t about having all the answers
At the end of the day, supporting a partner through tough times isn’t about fixing them. It’s about showing up. It’s about reminding them that they don’t have to go through it alone. And hey, if that support happens to include extra snacks and a cozy blanket, even better.