The truth is, YOLO isn’t just about acting wild or saying yes to every dumb idea your friends pitch at 2 a.m. It’s more about how people think about time, fear, and doing stuff that matters while we’re still around to do it.
I talked to a few psychologists, ran a small online poll (shoutout to the 1,700 people who answered), and dug into the messier, more real parts of the YOLO mindset. Spoiler alert: It’s not all skydiving and tequila shots.
Where did YOLO even come from?
Before the word became a hashtag, the idea was already baked into a bunch of cultures and philosophies. The Romans had “carpe diem,” which basically means “seize the day.” Not new. But YOLO hit different—probably because it came with a modern twist of recklessness and "I'm young, I don't care" energy.
It was catchy. It gave people permission to be bold—or at least pretend they were.
And yeah, some of that got real dumb. Like, “YOLO” as an excuse to cheat on your diet and your girlfriend in the same weekend. But at its core, it hit on something a lot of people feel: Life is short. So what are we even doing if we’re not living?
Why it still matters
I asked folks in my poll to describe what YOLO meant to them. The top three answers?
- Doing what makes you happy (72%)
- Taking risks you’d normally avoid (65%)
- Not wasting time on things you don’t love (61%)
What stood out wasn’t just that people wanted to do more—it was that a lot of them felt like they were stuck in routines that didn’t feel like living at all.
One guy said, “I sit in traffic, work a job I hate, scroll through Instagram, go to bed, repeat. YOLO just reminds me that this isn’t how I want to spend my one shot.”
Yikes. But also, yeah.
YOLO isn’t just impulsive—it’s intentional
Dr. Angela Romero, a behavioral psychologist who focuses on decision-making, told me that the YOLO mindset can actually reduce regret, if it’s done right.
“When people live with intention, not just impulsivity, they tend to feel more satisfied with their lives,” she said. “The problem is, we confuse ‘living fully’ with ‘avoiding boredom.’”
So, booking a trip because you’ve always wanted to see Iceland? Cool. Booking a trip because you’re mad at your roommate and want to post thirst traps in new scenery? Maybe not peak personal growth.
The stuff no one talks about
Here’s something interesting: In the poll, 39% of people said YOLO has made them more anxious instead of free.
Why? Because the pressure to “live your best life” all the time gets exhausting. Like, if you’re not backpacking in Bali or running your own startup by 27, are you even doing life right?
People get caught in this weird guilt spiral. They feel bad for not doing something bold every day, which defeats the point.
“I used to feel like I was wasting time if I wasn’t constantly pushing myself,” one woman told me. “Now I realize, sometimes YOLO just means calling my grandma or taking a long walk.”
And honestly, that’s the shift most people don’t talk about. That living fully isn’t always loud. Sometimes it’s soft. Sometimes it’s doing nothing and loving it.
What YOLO looks like at different ages
In your twenties, YOLO might look like couch-surfing across Europe or quitting your job to launch a podcast that three people listen to (and one of them is your mom).
But by your thirties or forties, it can shift into stuff like:
- Leaving a toxic job to start something meaningful
- Actually resting without guilt
- Saying “no” more often because you’re done wasting time on stuff you don’t care about
“Life stages affect what risk looks like,” said Dr. Romero. “For some people, staying in a miserable job feels safe. For others, leaving that job is their YOLO moment.”
It’s not about being reckless—it’s about being awake
Maybe that’s the heart of it. The real power of the YOLO mindset isn’t in how dramatic your choices are. It’s in waking up to the fact that time is ticking, and most of us have no clue how much we’ve got left.
That doesn’t mean sell your house and move to Costa Rica (unless you want to, in which case, let me know how it goes). It means asking questions like:
- Am I doing things I care about?
- Do I like the people I spend my time with?
- What am I putting off because I’m scared?
And maybe the scariest one: If I died next year, would I feel good about how I lived this one?
So what now?
You don’t need to jump out of planes or eat crickets in Thailand to live a YOLO life. You just need to be real with yourself about what matters, and then actually go do it—even if it’s messy.Go ahead and sign up for that dance class. Say something you’ve been holding in. Write the book you keep joking about. Take a break. Take a risk. Hug your mom. Quit that thing that’s eating your soul.
Because yeah. You do only live once.
And wouldn’t it suck to waste it?
If you’ve had your own quiet (or wild) YOLO moments, I’d love to hear them. Send them my way—I might just put them in a follow-up.